The way I see myself versus what others see

I think the way I see myself is definitely different from the way others see me. In some cases, I myself even see myself differently. Let’s starts from the physical to other aspects. I for one I am amazed when people tell me that I am slim.

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I for one have the image of me in my head as big. So what I mean is that the image of me in my mind or head and the image I see in the mirror is not the same. When I look at the mirror, I kinda think I have a small stature but that’s totally different from what is in my mind about me.

So when people tell me that I am small, we get off to an argument. Then I don’t see myself as slim but people keep counting me as slim. And I go, all this fat here is not convincing enough right? So I think that I am bodied maybe not fat. But they say that I am slim. How do you balance that?

Then I thought me as one of the most simple people you could actually work with but I had some issues with the way people saw me. I didn’t have a laughing face. Let’s say I used to have this very serious looks. I said used to because it’s in the pass now. I’ve worked on it so it’s no longer as before.

I picked up my dad’s serious look. My dad is one of the sweetest and kindest people you could meet but he’s face is naturally not smiling. You could mistake him for mean until you have a close dealing with him and then you will see that there’s no relationship between his facial look and his heart.

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I took after him. With my serious look, people saw me as someone who’s mean and doesn’t smile. They concluded that I would be a mean person when they haven’t had any close dealings with me. But there’s a saying that there’s no way to know the mind’s construction on the face I would always tell them.

When they get to relate with me on a close level, they would always talk about how they have misjudged me to be a mean person from a distance while their relating with me had proven otherwise. And I will always quote that saying for them. And they will now go on to tell me how people have even told them to stay away from me and all the gossip they have been saying behind Me.

It always keeps me wondering how people can go about to talk against others and tarnish their image even when they have not had any personal relationships with you. I have also learnt from my own experience to not judge people from what others say or to judge them from their looks. Because I have been a victim of that too.

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So I learn to give people the benefit of doubt. I over look their disposition or their looks and try to know them on a personal level before I can say anything about their personality. It’s only then that I can say things about them but not from what others have said.

But times have changed now. I am learning to smile more than I used to and people do not conclude that I am mean anymore when they haven’t had any personal touch with me. They say I have gotten warmer by the day and more lenient which is tallying with the me that I know about me.

I am an easy going person and the people around me see me as such too. Even though some persons try to take advantage of that but I have told me that I won’t change me because of what people do.

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