SPOILERS AHEAD

Chapters Read: 16-21

Ugh, I don't want this series to end! But that's sort of why good books are beautiful really. They mimic life in a way. They end.

That's the thing huh. I don't want the story to end, but only because the beginning, middle, and even the very end, are all so excellent. But one can't stall forever. Can't have it all. All good things must come to an end.

It makes you realize how everything is mostly a choice. Instead of fretting about the end so much, you may as well make the ending as painful as possible. Sounds messed up huh? But if the ending is painful well, that simply means you have a lot of good memories to miss.

All I know is, when I read 'Cirque Du Freak' or my other favorites, I'm having a good time. It makes this middle portion very enjoyable.

Larten Crepsley's death didn't hit me as hard as I thought it might, but it still hit me hard. But I mostly feel pensive. The end of chapter fifteen when he met his fate unafraid, and outnumbered, is what actually made me more upset/emotional than the death itself.

When I think about my two other favorite series of 'The Inheritance Cycle' and 'Harry Potter', Mr. Crepsley I believe was a mentor/friend/father figure that was around for Darren the longest time from a proportion perspective compared to the other series I mentioned. 'Cirque Du Freak' is the shortest series of the three by word count, but still. Mr. Crepsley is right by Darren's side for practically 75 percent of the series. I mean, in book one he's not a super friendly character yet but I still think the point remains. Mr. Crepsley is still MASSIVELY important in that first one for a multitude of reasons. Harry has like several mentors, and Eragon does as well. I'm pretty sure at some point in time, I saw some frameworks/guidelines online about how good stories are made and whatnot, and how various role models/mentors have their unofficial parts to play throughout a hero's journey, sorta like an algorithm or formula. But eh, I'm not about to get all analytical here. I'm just enjoying the story.

Mr. Crepsley is so one of a kind. He's got a perfect mixture of intelligence and toughness. He has wisdom and smoothness. He's formidable yet fairly approachable and reasonable. He died in such an epic way. He died thinking he not only vanquished the Lord of the Vampaneze, but he also died protecting Darren and his allies. While he didn't truly defeat the Lord of the Vampaneze, he DID protect Darren. Mr. Crepsley also died in his hometown which I suppose ain't bad either.

Sure, while Mr. Crepsley didn't truly defeat the Lord of the Vampaneze, he died thinking he did (as I said already) but I'm happy he at least died thinking he was victorious in the most important fight of his life. But what I must elude to specifically is that, the fight itself was INCREDIBLE. While Steve, Gannen, and the decoy Lord, were duping Larten and pretty much everyone, they WERE also truly trying to kill Larten, and Larten held his own admirably! He was an absolute NINJA up there. Personally, I believe that this proves Larten would have killed Steve had the Vampaneze not used trickery in this scenario.

Ugh, what a hero Larten Crepsley is! He is the ideal, model vampire in every way.

The whole chapter where Darren halucinates Larten's rescue seemed cruel as a reader the first time, the fakeout is nuts, and it still wasn't easy to read this time. But I do think it served a blunt purpose effectively beyond just teasing the reader. It simply emphasizes just how important Mr. Crepsley was to Darren.

Yeah, so I felt quite pensive after this death scene. I still remember how my adrenaline rushed when I first read this many years ago. This time, I just sort of sat and stared into space afterwards, thinking about life honestly.

It's really strange how a physically non-existent character you read about, and form entirely in your mind, based on a series of specific shapes (letters, HA) printed with ink on processed dead trees, can feel pretty darn real in a way that's hard to explain. Sounds like magic to me. Beyond trippy.

When Steve reveals himself as the Lord of the Vampaneze, man what a scene. The way he has to make it personal with Darren is just crazy. In fact, how this entire situation for Steve is essentially a gigantic revenge mission is just forever mind-blowing. He didn't even care about his mission as the Vampaneze Lord when he had his chance at killing Mr. Crepsley. Dude was really willing to let the vampaneze lose the war just so he could fulfill his own personal revenge plot. I don't even know what to say there.

Yes of course Steve is evil, insane, ruthless, and every other traditional adjective you can think of when you think about villains. But way back in book one, when Darren's teacher calls Steve an idiot savant, that was seriously the best description of Steve.

Steve really bases this entire intricate plot, on the dumbest made up, delusional, untrue thing and it's maddening. While I think I possibly understand psychologically what frustrates Steve, he was rejected by and called evil by Mr. Crepsley and then Mr. Crepsley takes Darren in. In a roundabout way, if you squint, that's a form of betrayal. But for whatever reason Steve refuses to believe that Darren saved his life and was basically forced to accept being a half-vampire.

I say all that because Steve is pretty much a walking tragedy just as much as he's evil. Like, if his temperament was adjusted or tweaked just a bit, in a way that allowed him to actually see that Darren saved him, I believe Steve could have been a generational type of person. Maybe that's bold but dude, his absolute unwavering planning and commitment to said plan, and his boldness, are traits unlike many characters I've read about, let alone villains. It's wild. I think I'm so blown away because, for whatever reason, this aspect of Steve's personality did not register for me when I first read the series.

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I think it's so amazing that Darren Shan, the author, made a four book series with Mr. Crepsley. That series I read just once I believe. That's going to be great fun.

Mr. Crepsley, what a legend!