The Hivewives Exposed: The little tragedies and big egos of Hive neighborhood life
As promised, I took a deep dive into the so-called “dispute” unfolding on Hive and Blurt. Here’s what I found and laid out with the uhm, unvarnished truth… and a generous splash of satire. Nothing is what it seems to be as presented by Matthieu and Everett. So to get the full story and context I did my own investigation. It's always important to take a few steps back and see it everything from just an observers point of view.
Cast of Characters:
Mathieu “The Drama Magnet” – The self-declared visionary constantly fuming at perceived injustices, threatening death when mildly annoyed, and confusing being questioned with persecution.
Gene “The Enforcer” Everett – Downvote overlord. Keeper of moral high ground while secretly orchestrating an alt-account army to punish small accounts.
Hurtlocker “The Enabler” – Cheerleader of chaos. Approves selective punishment while sprinkling subtle upvotes to keep the commieunity "safe".
Others – Random Hiveizens, mostly here for popcorn, quietly observing the circus. 🍿
My Observations (as the investigator)
@matthieu.noel: Claims victimhood while simultaneously wishing death upon others. Attempts diplomacy only to launch more accusations moments later. “I apologize… now prepare for a counterattack!”
@geneeverett: Delivers calm moral lectures while, allegedly, using multiple alt accounts to downvote every single post in rhythm like a well-rehearsed orchestra. Claims this as “justice.”
@hurtlocker: Approves chaos from the sidelines. Occasionally sprinkles positive votes to pretend balance exists.
The Other Hivewives: Whisper, document, and occasionally question reality: “Is this… normal?”
Every comment cycle: Mathieu rants → Gene enforces → Hurtlocker condones → Mathieu doubles down → repeat.
Imaginary threats, AI-generated profile pictures, and “French hats” are weaponized as evidence.
Apologies exist, but are strategically deployed to escalate tension.
Downvotes, alt accounts, and selective enforcement are normalized as heroic acts of community protection.
Patterns I Noticed
Threats = moral and authoritarian high ground
Downvotes = justice
Apologies = strategic distractions
AI images = evidence of evil
Chaos = community building
French Hats = Evil Conspiracy
In short, the thread is a masterclass in online absurdity, with everyone performing their assigned role in a theater of moral posturing, personal vendettas, and public spectacle.
Conclusion from My Investigation
After reviewing the comments, claims, and counterclaims:
Everyone is acting like heroes while the reality is pure chaos.
Threats, apologies, downvotes, and accusations are recycled like memes.
The entire dispute demonstrates how authority posturing can escalate absurdly when no one checks themselves.
I present this not as a moral judgment but as an honest, satirical observation of events as they unfolded. Popcorn recommended.
Extended Field Notes
Having spent what can only be described as an excessively long period observing the Hive comment ecosystem, I can now present the full absurdity of the situation, straight from my vantage point as a neutral investigator with functioning judgment.
The Spark
Mathieu leaves his opening salvo on Hurtlocker’s post followed with an Immediate emotional escalation. Mathieu self-identifies as the perpetual victim, citing fake accounts, unfair downvotes, and alleged conspiracy. The words “I will show you the psycho!” appear multiple times. Already, red flags are everywhere.
If drama were a currency, Mathieu would be the richest man on the platform. Every complaint is like a lottery ticket where the more you shout, the higher the imagined payout became.
Enter Gene “The Enforcer”
Gene responds, patient and measured, with repeated instructions on resolving the conflict.
Gene Immediately claims moral high ground, points out threats, and hints at alt accounts. He hasn’t downvoted in five years, allegedly… but now his fingers hover over, allegedly, other alt accounts like a symphony conductor ready to cue the orchestra and operates like a stoic monk with a hammer. Every downvote is delivered with the calm precision of a heart surgeon. Yet somehow it is simultaneously a medieval public execution.
Throughout this, Hurtlocker “The Enabler” observes, approves, condones, and occasionally sprinkles minor positive votes to create the illusion of balance. He acts as the safety valve of the operation while chaos ensues and is allowed, but only the right chaos. Picture a judge at a circus who occasionally throws peanuts at the lions, just to keep them from eating the clowns. That's Hurtlocker.
The Ping-Pong of Insults and Threats
Mathieu insists he’s been wronged, claims death threats were misinterpreted, and accuses Gene of unethical multi-account behavior. However, Mathieu doubles down on accusations even after repeated clarifications, repeatedly apologizes only to launch new attacks. Apologies here thus functions as a tactical distractions. Each “I’m sorry” is like a magician’s sleight-of-hand. While you watch the left hand, the right hand escalates the conflict.
Gene highlights that Mathieu threatened death and continues to misrepresent interactions. Despite repeated instructions and explanations, Mathieu either cannot or will not process reality. Multiple alt accounts are deployed to respond, comment, or amplify downvotes. It was like watching people cheering on the lions to the christians maimed in ancient Rome.
The alt accounts acted like synchronized swimmers, executing perfectly coordinated downvote patterns. Every post by Mathieu is punished in rhythm, echoing across Hive and Blurt like the faint ding of a moral gavel.
Other Hive users peek in from the corners, whispering to each other, occasionally documenting absurd posts. They do not intervene, but they notice everything. Imagine a gallery of art critics watching a toddler throw paint at a masterpiece while someone else applauds. it’s a perfect analogy. Unfortunately when I arrived to observe the scene, the art piece was already covered in paint. I don't think I could have done much anyways. Majority of Hivians can be quiet unforgivable, easily jumping at first opportunity to down vote anyone who disagrees with them.
The Escalation Loop
This is the “Groundhog Day” phase. Every comment cycle repeats the same thing as before.
Mathieu rants. → Gene enforces. →Hurtlocker condones.→ Mathieu doubles down.
The Investigator’s Verdict
All sides claim victimhood, all sides claim justification, yet the real common denominator is absurdity.
The Hivewives, in all their glory, prove one undeniable truth:
You don’t need facts to escalate a dispute online. You only need righteous indignation, a sprinkle of selective enforcement, and the occasional imaginary threat.
The hive platform functions as both the stage and the props. Downvotes, threats, and alt accounts are merely the instruments by which chaos is orchestrated. Meanwhile, the “civil society” of other users looks on, popcorn in hand, documenting each ridiculous move.
Downvotes don’t pay for popcorn. If you appreciate independent satire and documentation, support via Monero (XMR):
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