I Thought They Were Kidding . . .

Very rarely does the @handofzara need instructions on how to drink a beer, especially on a #beersaturday.

I mean come on, who needs instructions on how to drink a beer? I have been drinking and smoking since I was 7! I don't need any silly instructions!

What? You don't believe me that I have been drinking since I was 7?

That is my Class picture from 1972! Yea, my dad made me submit this for the school yearbook, thinking that I might be ashamed and embarrassed so as to change my ways.

Little did he know that chicks dig the "bad boys"! That year was one of the best years of my life.

I got kissed six times by seven different girls! The seventh girl "tried to kiss me" and just as I puckered up, her so called boyfriend knocked me to the ground.

Well when I got up from the sucker punch, I put him in a "head lock" until he cried like a little girl.

The following week I had an unscheduled vacation from school, at least that is what my mother called it.

Hey, is it my fault that chicks dig a "bad boy"?

I later learned, after breaking into the principal's office one night in the fourth grade and reading my "permanent record", that it is officially called a suspension.

Who knew that a "permanent record" was actually a thing. What kind of freak wants to know and to monitor all the things you say and do . . . for your entire life? What for?

Losers!

Get your own life and leave me alone!

Could you imagine spending your entire life monitoring other peoples lives?

During my fifth grade in elementary school, sometime after my own infamous break in of the Principal's Office, someone set off the fire sprinkler system, and all of my "permanent record" miraculously became far less permanent.

God bless the poor soul who did that dastardly deed.

I sure wish I knew what was on his record, as it had to have been far worse than mine.

Gee,I really do wish I could have read about his life and all the bad things he must have done, in elementary school, to have had such an awful permanent record worthy of destruction. :)

When I got back to school, after my unsceduled vacation/suspension I was told . . .

Yea okay, "obey the rules" and "follow instructions", got it.

Well, I learned then and there that all rules have an exception and all instructions can be flawed.

Sometimes, just sometimes, people in authority give instructions, just for their own amusement, to see if you will actually fall for it!

Sometimes folks in authority, just want to tell you what to do, just to see if you will do it. It is a sick game they play.

And so when I read the back of this beer can, I could not believe my eyes.

Seriously?

Shake a can of beer 3 times!

No way am I shaking a can of beer three times and then opening it. I haven't fallen for that old gag since the third grade when Jimmy McMullen's old brother told me to do that. What a waste of beer that was.

Alright, so the head on this beer is a little flat. I must admit that had I followed "instructions", then maybe, just perhaps, the beer would have poured with a much larger foamier head.

What can I say, I had a scarred childhood of lost love and of wasted beer, too bad it is no longer a part of my permanent record.

Live and learn, that is my motto.

Following instructions are a back up plan, for when things go wrong. Like putting together furniture from IKEA and having extra screws.

Or putting together kids toys that don't work, you know like on any given Christmas Eve with the Mrs. @handofzara droning away, "that doesn't look right" and "you should read the instructions."

Yea, I am still not shaking a can a beer and then opening it.

Stuck in my ways with life lessons learned long ago. Thank you Jimmy McMullen's older brother for a proper education on beer etiquette, which I guess, as a result of this post, is now part of my permanent record.

The BLOCKCHAIN is FOREVER!

BEER NAME: Nitro Quad
STYLE: Belgium Quadrupel
BREWER: Kasteel, Somewhere in Belgium
ABV: 11%
APPEARANCE: dark with a rather disappointing flat head
AROMA: malts
TASTE: somewhat sweet roasted malts
MOUTHFEEL: medium body, carbonates well and the ABV stings just a bit

Overall an enjoyable brew although the head was a little disappointing, Kasteel should probably do something about that, like give proper instructions on how to make the head a little more foamy.

If you have read this little trip down memory lane with me, then God bless you.

I have a a #beersaturday tradition of asking a TRIVIA QUESTION and the first person to answer correctly in the COMMENTS wins a BEER TOKEN.

Question: If you are in Brussels, Belgium and following instructions properly, you headed directly NORTH, what is the first country you would come to?

Good Luck and don't you wish you had paid attention in the 3rd grade geography class about now?

See y'all next #beersaturday!