10 Thousand letters to Santa

It is that time of the year again and Santa is reading all the little kids letters....this year he has a lot to read.
If you do not know already the island these letters are coming from, are from the guy who hung himself with toilet paper while the cameras were off in the maximum security 24 hour surveillance jail, when the two guards went on brake for those same two hours as a noose of toilet paper was being fashioned so that he could hanging himself on a door knob, island is suspected of having many many kids who disappear each year in an underground bunker where those small voices would not be heard.
There is approximately 840,00 children in the USA alone that go missing...that is 1 every 40 seconds....So i though it would be funny if all those kids wrote to Santa....
What would they ask for, oh probably:
Lube
Foreplay
a Safe word
Sleep
A friend said:
"Freedom"
"Death" ... likely
"There mom and dad"....if they are even old enough to know them, yup, they would probable be calling for mommy, good one friend. Thanks for your input.

Dear reader, can you think of any?
Feel free to share what the little children of pedo island would ask Santa for, in the comments below.

Disclaimer: If you find this meme that you clicked on, waited to load, read, and got to this point in reading and then TOOK offence, as my friend would say, you got"Butthurt" you probably believe that, Pedophilia is a sexual orientation and not rape of a minor....in which case please leave a comment of hate and malice to really show me that i am a terrible person...