A Round of Religious and Blasphemous Jokes

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[From Facebook]

Hey people, I've got to scream out a disclaimer here, if you're offended by religious/blasphemous jokes you probably should sit this one out (although I think jokes like these were made just for you 😂😂). Well, there, disclaimer done. Let's get right into it!

I've made so many religious/blasphemous jokes in my time, I've posted some long form ones here like: Why Heaven Can't be a Paradise
and Islam's Virgins in Heaven, etc, but the short form content I've been posting on Facebook and other social media that I roam, now I've decided to compile some of them for a longer post for Hive. More of these should come in the future. Enjoy!


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This fourth one is one of my all time favorites, but it needs a little explanation for non-Nigerians, 'abacha' is a Nigerian food and the women who sell it are fond of asking with the Igbo language 'would there be fish in it?' instead of asking 'should I put fish in it?' I wonder why, it's not like there is no way to express that in their language. Here goes:

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😃👍




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Roll with @nevies, I run a Humor, deeper thoughts and sex talk blog here on Hive🌚

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26 comments
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Damn ahah
I'm a sucker for dark humor and I sure had some laughs!
A joke for you: do you know the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

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Tell me 😂

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The picture only needs one nail to be hanged

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Hahahahaha 🤣
Yo, fuck, that's a great one🤓

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WHY ARE WE HERE? ))) WATCH THIS @nevies... https://www.bitchute.com/video/Eu5bTM8je0IC/

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I've just watched it, @manorvillemike, what message are you trying to pass by sending it, please?

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no message

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Alright, man, I should add that the man in the video was talking balderdash, I see he has written books now based on those things, he was just trying to make money from these books; Christians are really moved by stories like these.

Are you a Christian?

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research what Howard Storm has done with his life since 1985

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I bet he's made a lot of money too, isn't it?🌚

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Follow up video by Richie from Boston.... just something to think about. I mean no offence.

https://www.bitchute.com/video/INMwEIlGb81x/

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No offense taken at all, man, feel free, please. If you're a Christian and would like to talk about the Bible with me I'm interested, I can show you that the whole thing is a scam and just ancient myths and legends like the Greek myths. All religions are just man made institutions made to organize society.

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That's what I thought for 60 years .. was taught evolution and big bang theory .. Everything is a theory... I believed like the ancient Greeks, you have to see it to believe it. Now I am finding out evil, real evil from hell is real.. Love is the counter to evil. Whether you believe in God or not Life is to compilated to come from nothing. Just the wall of one living cell would be mathematically impossible to recreate in nature. There has to be an intelligence behind the creation of life. Religions are just a puny way to acknowledge where we originated from. cheers

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One doesn't have to subscribe to any theory of how we came to be in this world, for now the only certain thing is that we don't know. The big bang, evolution and all the different millions of religious origin stories are all speculations, no one knows how the world came to be. About whether an intelligent mastermind was behind it, that is possible, we do not know, but that doesn't mean these religions are true, these religions merely expanded and made stories based on the idea that the world might have an intelligent creator. They're all man made stories like all the superman movies made out of the idea that a man with great powers came to the earth. These religions can't be true because they're all contradicting each other and contradicting themselves.

Also, if an intelligent being can come out of nowhere without a creator then why can't the world have come from nowhere too? No matter how you look at it at the end of the day you'll have to accept that something came from nowhere or could have come from nowhere, you either accept the world came or could have come from nowhere or that a God came or could have come from nowhere. If you say God has a creator then who created that creator or the creator of that creator? At the end of the day we have to accept that one thing came from nowhere or could have come from nowhere or that it is not comprehensible to the human mind.

I like it that you see the importance of love, I do too and I agree there is a lot of evil in the world. When it comes to hell and heaven though, I'm certain it is all balderdash because I have read the Bible for myself, the kind of inconsistency, contradiction and silly things in the Bible would make you laugh at the belief that it is the word of a supreme being or that any of it is real.

I'm sure you're a very reasonable fellow and you know some of these things, but the truth is that knowing religion for what it really is can be tricky and hidden from the eyes of those who haven't looked at the right places. Let's take the Bible for example, it preaches love, peace, wisdom, morality, but at the same time it preaches slavery, genocide, misogyny, and unspeakable cruelty. In church and preachings no one ever mentions the evil parts of the Bible, they dwell on the good parts. This way if one doesn't look in the right places the truth of the Bible would be hidden from them. Do you want me to give you Bible scriptures that shows the evil parts of the Bible?

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You said a lot but I know no more than when you started. We live in an imperfect physical world with 5 senses. You trash religion with logical explanations. The fact remains the age old question of what's it all about. Keep asking questions @nevies but keep an open mind like the Ancient Greeks. Who when confronted with a problem they couldn't solved, put it on a shelf in their minds until more evidence appeared.

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Thank you, I keep an open mind on the question of how the world began, but when it comes to religion it is certain they're all fictional. 100% certain and I have all the materials to prove it.

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Appallingly offensive. I literally tore my eyes out after reading. :0D

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Oh, shit! That's the exact reaction I was aiming for, my God, I've made it!

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Ass hole 😂😂

I loved this one the most 👇👇
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Ah, I see you're a girl of culture, I love that.

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Of course, everyone loves a good head, irrespective of gender 🤧🥺

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Yeah, you're right, it's just the way you identified with it on this post, it shows you're a girl of culture. Many motherfuckers is out there that won't keep it gee like that😎✌️

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