TRANSACTIONAL BONDS: THE CURRENCY OF CARE

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People don’t care about you most of the time; it is usually what you can do for them that matters most to them. Even those who love you deeply sometimes care more about what you can do for them than how you feel at the time. You hear people complaining about what was not done for them, but you hardly hear people talk about what they were unable to do for others.

I used to love this popular saying, and I don’t know the origin of it; it says, “Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country”. This is how relationships should be: parents, siblings, friends- any relationship one finds themselves in, one should think of what they can do for the other person and not what the other person can do for them.

You will see people who may or may not love a person, probably in a romantic relationship, staying away from their partners for a lengthy period of time, busy with other things and still fail to reach out or check up on their partners, whom they may or may not be in love with.

When one cares or value the order person, it is believed that they cannot stay busy for their partner and will try to reach out to their partners in interval of time, when they don’t reach out for a long time, it is usually said that the one that always reaches out first is the one that cares and has value for the other person or whatever it is they have between them.

When people fail to communicate with you for a long period of time and will only try to reach out when they need something from you or want to have your opinion about something, it is interpreted that they don’t value you as an individual, but they value mostly what you have to offer.

In the end, what matters most to people is your value to them; an employer, for instance, will not employ you in their establishment if you don’t bring value to the establishment. This is how people see every type of relationship now; even some family members don’t regard you if you don’t have value to them. Most relationships today are transactional, and the currency is value for time.

In conclusion, I believe that any relationship can only thrive when we focus on what we can give rather than focusing on what we can receive from the other person. The deepest bonds are those whose worth is not tied to how well we perform but is tied to just being in existence.

My name is @rishagamo, and this is my submission to the IU contest, Theme: "Do People Care About You, or What You Can Do for Them?"

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