Merry Fartmas!

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I'd like to cropdust everyone with some Fartmas Cheer and share my Fart Cookies and Fartmas jokes with you.

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I curated the best of the best from reddit and numerous other sites to bring you some Christmas jokes. Maybe you can tell some to your family instead of talking about politics.

Without further a doo-doo, here we go:

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.

How do you know when Santa’s around?
You can always sense his presents.

What was Santa's favorite subject in school?
Chemis-tree!

What do you call a broke Santa Claus?
Saint-nickel-less.

Why did Santa Claus get a parking ticket on Christmas Eve?
He left his sleigh in a snow parking zone.

What’s as big as a Christmas tree but is lighter than a feather?
Its shadow. Alternate answer is a FART. Either answer would be accepted on Jeopardy.

**What did Luke Skywalker say after he planted a Christmas tree farm? **
May the forest be with you!

Baby Yoda loves that one

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How do Christmas trees get ready for a night out?
They spruce up!

What is a Christmas tree's favorite candy?
Orna-mints!

Knock, knock! Who’s there? Noah. Noah who?
Noah good Christmas joke?

Knock, knock! Who's there? Donut. Donut who?
Donut open til Christmas!

For my Movie fans out there, heres a few Christmas Movie Quotes

From Elf
"We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: Candy, candy canes, candy corn, and syrup."

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From Jingle All The Way
Who told you you could eat my cookies?

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The Happiest Season
I just woke up thinking about going home with you and got very excited about Christmas.

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And my favorite, since we know Farts exist and they are invisible

From The Santa Clause
Just because you can’t see something, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

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Merry Christmas and Merry Fartmas to All

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12 comments
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How many bad puns can you fit in a post ?
epic fail: all of them
Merry Fartmas to you too my dude :)

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play this mix when your Fartmas guests overstay their welcome

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Hey man, I've seen you're not that active posting on Hive, but you still lurk and comment every now and then, have you heard of Threads? It's like Twitter on Hive, and the interactions there are short and to the point, perhaps I can convince you to try it out haha

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