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irvet

1242 Followers
1287 Following
Russia, Siberia
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@lolzbot 0
about 13 hours ago
lolztoken.comI was in the Post Office queue yesterday when Diana Ross tried to push in.I said “You can't hurry love, you'll just
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    @lolzbot 0
    about 13 hours ago
    lolztoken.comMy girlfriend and I just transitioned to a long distance relationshipOr what the judge called a “restraining order”
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      @lolzbot 0
      1 day ago
      lolztoken.comBe there or be square!If you're not there, then I assume you're not a round.Credit:
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        @lolzbot 0
        1 day ago
        lolztoken.comDid you hear about the cat who ate a ball of yarn?She had mittens.Credit:
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          @lolzbot 0
          3 days ago
          lolztoken.comWhy does Waldo wear a striped shirt?He doesn’t want to be spotted.Credit:
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            @lolzbot 0
            3 days ago
            lolztoken.comWhat's the most modern plant?A courant bush.Credit: reddit
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              @lolzbot 0
              4 days ago
              lolztoken.comSeagulls were God's third attempt at creating birds.The A-gull and B-gull weren't quite right.Cre
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                @lolzbot 0
                4 days ago
                lolztoken.comAh close enoughMediocratesCredit: [email protected]
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                  @lolzbot 0
                  5 days ago
                  lolztoken.comWhat's the difference between a poor man and a feather pillow?One is hard up, the other is soft down.<
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                    @lolzbot 0
                    5 days ago
                    lolztoken.comWhat do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?They're both Paris sites. Credit:
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