LOLZ Weekly Joke Challenge - Help Build A Hive Based Joke Database and Earn $LOLZ
Week 5 Of the LOLZ Joke Challenge Is Here
Hey folks, now that the new year is behind us, it is time to get back to building. So today we are kicking back off our Weekly Joke Challenge.
As we posted last, we have moved to our LOLZ Community joke database for our @lolzbot. We accepted just under 50 jokes from our earlier joke challenges and we want to add many many more jokes. Our hope is to add 10-20 jokes per week so that we can start a rotation of jokes and hopefully keep the jokes fresh and funny.
The Tasks
- Tell us a joke in the comments. 1 LOLZ
- Re-blog this post, and tell us you did in the comments. 1 LOLZ
- Tag a friend. 1 LOLZ
All rewards will be distributed via the drop bot in the comments so be sure to leave a comment even if you only reblogged the post and don't feel like telling a joke.
If we select your joke to include in the database, we will reward you with an additional 5 $LOLZ, and include you as the source for the joke (unless you prefer to be anonymous, in which case please say so in your comment). Post as many jokes as you like, and earn an additional 5 $LOLZ for each joke selected for inclusion.
What We Are Looking For
Any joke can be posted and earn an $LOLZ, although we ask that you stay Safe For Work.
To be selected for inclusion in our database, your joke will need to be -
- Clean. LOLZ is kid friendly. Please, no dirty, racial, or potty humor.
- Short. We prefer jokes with short setups and punch lines.
- Funny! Or at least Punny.
Your joke does not to be original. Any joke you know will do.
Lets get this party started!
Come on people... MAKE US LAUGH!
About the LOLZ Project
LOLZ Project is an engagement project with the mission of spreading laughter and joy on the Hive blockchain. Hive users can use the !LOL or !LOLZ command in comments to share a clean joke and tip the author an $LOLZ token.
Help Support the LOLZ Project
Here are a few ways you can help the LOLZ Project.
- Use the !LOL and !LOLZ command often to tip fellow Hive authors.
- Upvote and re-Hive our posts. All rewards will be used to help cover server costs and increase curation value.
- If one of our jokes makes you smile, consider giving it an upvote.
- Follow @lolztoken and participate in our airdrops, contests, and giveaways.
!LOLZ
lolztoken.com
ERROR: Joke failed.
@emeka4, You need more $LOLZ to use this command. The minimum requirement is 16.0 LOLZ.
You can get more $LOLZ on HE.
Ja cool 😎
!LOLZ
lolztoken.com
Bartender: Are you positive?
Credit: theabsolute
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @dragon-ti
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/1)
Thanks for the !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
I won’t be able to live with myself.
Credit: marshmellowman
@dragon-ti, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (3/10)
!LOLZ
lolztoken.com
At least that's what she wrote in her diary.
Credit: henryglowz
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @yeckingo1
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (3/8)
Thanks for the !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
A masta-Don.
Credit: deanlogic
@yeckingo1, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/10)
A classic one, maybe so classic that it might already be in the database:
Bruce Lee was fast, but he had an even faster brother: Sudden Lee...
And re-blogged.
Keep up the good work!
Thanks! We hadn't heard it, but like it. We will add it to our database so I need to !DROPLOLZ 7
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@manuvert - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Thanks!
Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up literally everything.
Thanks for the jokes! Rather than drop you LOLZ in the comments since you gave us so many, I will just send you the tokens for the jokes we accept like last time. Thanks! !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
We are called the Algebros.
Credit: theabsolute
@marshmellowman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)
For sure no worries
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
What do you call a hippie’s wife? Mississippi.
Some men say they don’t wear their wedding band because it cuts off circulation. Well, that’s the point, isn’t it?
I asked the IT guy, "How do you make a Motherboard?" He said, "I tell her about my job."
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it it’s probably s***.
!LOLZ ... that is great, a little icky for our database but funny!
lolztoken.com
He lost interest.
Credit: lofone
@marshmellowman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (4/10)
How does a computer get drunk? It takes screen shots.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
How does the man in the moon get his hair cut? Eclipse it.
Why aren’t dogs good dancers? Because they have two left feet.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Dogs can't see your bones. But CAT scan.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Why are art collectors such big fans of gasoline? Because it makes their Van Gogh
What do you call a noodle that doesn't drink? Soba.
A century ago, two brothers decided it was possible to fly. And as you can see, they were Wright.
Why did the parents not like their son’s biology teacher? He had skeletons in his closet.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Their first daughter was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. Now they’re hoping for triplets so they can have a whole set.
What do you call a mobster who’s buried in cement? A hardened criminal.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it, just in case there's a salad dressing.
The reason some politicians like to stand on their record is to keep voters from examining it.
The cat who ate a ball of yarn? She had mittens.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Joke - I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Reblogged.
Tagging @lightningjohn
Posted Using LeoFinance Beta
Love it! Thanks for the contribution and the tag and reblog. !DROPLOLZ 8
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@gillianpearce - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
How many egomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the world revolves around him.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
If an anonymous comment goes unread, is it still irritating?
The trouble with getting to work on time is that it makes the day so long.
Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
What do you call Santa’s helpers? Subordinate Clauses.
What’s Irish and stays out all night? Patty O’Furniture.
If prisoners could take their own mugshots… they'd be called cellfies.
Why are cats bad storytellers? Because they only have one tale.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
I tried to start a professional hide and seek team, but it didn't work out. Turns out, good players are hard to find.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims.
What does a CIA agent do when it's time for bed? He goes under cover.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
What do you call a paper airplane that can't fly? Stationary.
What do you call a dead magician? An abra-cadaver.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Did you hear about the perfume that smells of nothing? I think it's total non-scents.
The inventor of the throat lozenge died last month. There was no coffin at his funeral.
I have a joke about trickle down economics. But 99% of you will never get it.
As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Today I learned that if a canoe turns upside down in the water, you can safely wear it on your head. Because it's cap-sized.
If you arrest a mime, do you have to tell him he has the right to remain silent?
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Why did the rooster cross the road? To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Two men walk into a bar. You’d think at least one of them would have ducked.
What do you call a guy who’s had too much to drink? A cab.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare line.
!DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Did you know that the first french fries weren’t cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
Awesome! Thanks for the contribution! !DROPLOLZ 6
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@belhaven14 - You received a 6.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Where does an Inuit keep his Bitcoins? In a cold wallet.
Rebloged
Thanks for the !LOLZ !DROP 7
That was a joke of a season for sure! !LOLZ
What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common? They're both Paris sites.
@gremlinchef
@masterofwolves
Love it! Thanks for the contribution! !DROPLOLZ 7
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@dyson-the-booper - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Psst.....would you like to here a joke about pizza?......but it's a little cheesy! :D !LOLZ
Reblogged & @hollowknightgod
lolztoken.com
and accidentially won the Tour de France.
Credit: blumela
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @boboman
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/2)
This is great. We will add it. !LOLZ !DROPLOLZ 8
lolztoken.com
He needs me to get him out of jail.
Credit: vaipraonde
@boboman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/10)
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@boboman - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
What do you call an asthmatic Russian grand master – Gary Gasper-cough
Thanks for the !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
Elongate could be really drawn out.
Credit: mrhuman88
@hoosie, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (3/10)
What should you do with a dangerous alien girl? Pre-date-her.
Thanks for the !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
A depression.
Credit: theabsolute
@networkallstar, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (4/10)
@lolztoken
How do you get your handkerchief to dance? Put a little boogy in it!
Upvoted, Reblogged, @piratethanos
!LUV !WINE !giphy Jokes
Congratulations, @wesphilbin You Successfully Shared 0.200 WINEX With @lolztoken.
You Earned 0.200 WINEX As Curation Reward.
You Utilized 2/5 Successful Calls.
Contact Us : WINEX Token Discord Channel
WINEX Current Market Price : 0.290
Via Tenor
@wesphilbin(2/10) gave you LUV.
!LOLZ funny. Too "eww" for the database but funny!
lolztoken.com
Luckily I Noah guy.
Credit: happyme
@wesphilbin, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)
@lolztoken
No worries! And thanks for the LOLZ. I love the positive intent of this token, just like the LUV token, so grabbed a few as well!
"I had gas once, but it passed!" 😜😆
There comes a time when living becomes something like a competition, when one shamelessly rejoices over the death of one's neighbour, as if he were a rival who has been eliminated. - Pierre Magnan
Thanks for the comment! !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
He lost interest.
Credit: lofone
@quotes-haven, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (5/10)
Thank you. My pleasure. 😀
My entire life.
!LOLZ funny... thanks!
lolztoken.com
The bartender shouts Geto out of my pub! We don’t serve your type!
Credit: ifiwasfrank
@kryptik, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (6/10)
what if we make jokes about potty training is that alive! I can't use any of my jokes now as they are mainly for the deranged! Let's give it a go anyway....
Q: Why doesn't Voldemort have glasses? A: Nobody nose - lol I think it's hilarious.
Q: Why do bees have sticky hair? A: Because the use Honeycombs?
Okay I'm done....
!LOZ
!LOLZ they are both great. Thanks! !DROPLOLZ 9
lolztoken.com
The bartender shouts Geto out of my pub! We don’t serve your type!
Credit: ifiwasfrank
@mimismartypants, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (7/10)
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@mimismartypants - You received a 9.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
!LOLZtypo on the second one if you gonna use it. I Just fixed! It's bees not need.
lolztoken.com
When I see food I eat it.
Credit: happyme
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @mimismartypants
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/2)
and !DROPLOLZ 2 more.
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@mimismartypants - You received a 2.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
👀I stayed up all night trying to find where the sun was...
But then it dawned on me😉
Reblog have a great one
@iamraincrystal
!LOL
lolztoken.com
He lost interest.
Credit: lofone
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @benthomaswwd
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/1)
Thanks! Had a good !LOL reading all the other comments on here. Super good vibes! 😂🤣
!ALIVE
@benthomaswwd! You Are Alive so I just staked 0.1 $ALIVE to your account on behalf of @iamraincrystal. (1/30)
The tip has been paid for by the We Are Alive Tribe through the earnings on @alive.chat, feel free to swing by our daily chat any time you want.
lolztoken.com
Because they know how to multiply.
Credit: theabsolute
@benthomaswwd, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @iamraincrystal
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/2)
Thought you may appreciate it
It cheered my spirits !LOL
Have blessed weekend !LUV
@iamraincrystal
It's Great To Be !ALIVE
😎🎁
@benthomaswwd(1/1) gave you LUV.
lolztoken.com
We are called the Algebros.
Credit: theabsolute
@iamraincrystal, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @benthomaswwd
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/1)
@iamraincrystal! You Are Alive so I just staked 0.1 $ALIVE to your account on behalf of @benthomaswwd. (6/20)
The tip has been paid for by the We Are Alive Tribe through the earnings on @alive.chat, feel free to swing by our daily chat any time you want.
!LOLZ That is great! !DROPLOLZ 8
lolztoken.com
This changes everything.
Credit: marshmellowman
@benthomaswwd, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (8/10)
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@benthomaswwd - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Brilliant thank you very much
@lolztoken
Have a wonderful week ahead
Full of Laughter
I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.
🤣
!LOLZ
lolztoken.com
They're always taking things literally.
Credit: lofone
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @benthomaswwd
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/2)
We like this one too! !DROPLOLZ 5
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@benthomaswwd - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Thank you so much
@lolztoken
Appreciate this great project
I was addicted to the hokey pokey... but thankfully, I turned myself around.
!LOL
!ALIVE
@lolztoken! You Are Alive so I just staked 0.1 $ALIVE to your account on behalf of @benthomaswwd. (4/20)
The tip has been paid for by the We Are Alive Tribe through the earnings on @alive.chat, feel free to swing by our daily chat any time you want.
lolztoken.com
They're always taking things literally.
Credit: lofone
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @benthomaswwd
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/2)
!LOLZ ... we already had that one, but we still love it.
lolztoken.com
but now I'm clean.
Credit: lofone
@benthomaswwd, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)
I am not surprised, i will have to try and up my joke game 😉
What is faster Hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch a cold.
!LOLZ
!ALIVE
@lolztoken! You Are Alive so I just staked 0.1 $ALIVE to your account on behalf of @benthomaswwd. (15/20)
The tip has been paid for by the We Are Alive Tribe through the earnings on @alive.chat, feel free to swing by our daily chat any time you want.
lolztoken.com
When I got my coffee it was marked Clark.
Credit: lobaobh
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @benthomaswwd
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/2)
here's a funny one I heard today:
Dad, can I have 1 crypto please?
what?
you want $547?
what you want to do with $1,756?
do you realize that $20,094 is a lot of money?
here is $732 for you
Posted Using LeoFinance Beta
Nice one! xD
Here is a 2 crypto 4u ;D
!LUV
!PIZZA
@networkallstar(3/10) gave you LUV.
!LOLZ thanks for the laugh!
lolztoken.com
Luckily I Noah guy.
Credit: happyme
@yieldgrower, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)
Owch.. !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
they’re so full of themselves.
Credit: marshmellowman
@yieldgrower, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (9/10)
!LOL
lolztoken.com
ERROR: Joke failed.
@teenagecrypto, You need more $LOLZ to use this command. The minimum requirement is 16.0 LOLZ.
You can get more $LOLZ on HE.
$WINE
Hi @theguruasia, This Post Is Older Than 3 Days Days.
Please Try Another Post.
(We Will Not Send This Error Message In Next 24 Hrs).
Contact Us : WINEX Token Discord Channel
WINEX Current Market Price : 0.799
Thanks! !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
count as resistance training?
Credit: marshmellowman
@theguruasia, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (10/10)
PIZZA Holders sent $PIZZA tips in this post's comments:
@networkallstar(3/5) tipped @yieldgrower (x1)
You can now send $PIZZA tips in Discord via tip.cc!
What do Thanksgiving and a junkie have in commen? A cold turkey.
Nice! Thanks for the contribution! !DROPLOLZ 6
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@networkallstar - You received a 6.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
I'm glad that our favorite joke challenge got back! I've got 3 jokes for you!
-Even the cake was in tiers.
-Then they call me ugly and poor.
-I told her to get out of my fort.
I hope you guys like them, as always keep up your great job! :)
These are great. Thanks! We will accept all three and drop you 16 total. !DROPLOLZ 9
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@lofone - You received a 9.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
I'm glad you liked them! Keep up the good work!
!LOL
lolztoken.com
She said because it won't sit still.
Credit: minopoly
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lofone
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/4)
!DROPLOLZ 7 more.
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@lofone - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
how do you turn a duck in to a singer?
Put it in the microwave until its Bill Withers
!LOLZ. We like it! !DROPLOLZ 6
lolztoken.com
A masta-Don.
Credit: deanlogic
@basilmarples, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (11/10)
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@basilmarples - You received a 6.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
Michael I want to withdraw my crypto because am tired of heart attack.
Yesterday I thought it would go up but came down, today I thought that it could go be in yesterday range but went down again.
@Burlarj
Sorry... !LOLZ
lolztoken.com
You look drunk!
Credit: hollowknightgod
@hive-world, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (12/10)
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine: we just get better with age. The next day she locked me in the cellar.
!LOLZ good one! !DROPLOLZ 8
lolztoken.com
An LOLZ Airdrop!
@playbyhive - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.
lolztoken.com
We are called the Algebros.
Credit: theabsolute
@playbyhive, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/10)