At Times Being Too Soft Is A Big Problem

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Anytime I hear the statement "this guy is too soft or calm", I will just laugh within me, they don't know I have gone far thinking of different wickedness or just try to weight what been the hard kind of guy will be and just imagine which one will pay more, well all I want is just to have this peace of mind without any trouble lurking around, to some people when you are too calm or soft, you are the mumu type since no matter what they do to you, you won't say anything, well I don't know why I'm absent when they were sharing the gift of wickedness.

Something painful happened to me some days back and I just kind of imagine how the situation might have been if I have just a pinch of wickedness in me, last week Monday, I had an emergency call from home and it is not something I can just skip so I had to just obey the call but I was kinda broke that period so I had to just loan some money from my sister just to fuel my car even though I knew the car was somehow faulty because it takes more fuel than usual but I just decided to use 1 stone to kill 2 birds, go home and also visit my mechanic at home and I knew the fuel I will use will be my loss that period, I got home but spent almost 85% of what I borrowed on just fuel, I was kinda pained but at least I visited my mechanic to get the problem fixed and I did the necessary errand that I needed to do at home.

2days after I decided to return back to Lagos and I budgeted the amount I will spend of fuel which was just 8000 naira, this fateful day, I passed few fuel station and somehow I turned back to get fuel in the last station that I passed (don't even know who send me), and I told the attendance that I need 8k fuel and I saw her press the button so I off the car and start pressing my phone and instead of the attendance to pay attention to what she was selling, she was busy gossiping with her friend and boom within 3mins I looked up because I was wondering why she wasn't done yet and to my surprised the meter was still running and when I looked it was already counting 34k, immediately she heard me said ahh, she look up and immediately stop the machine.

The funniest part was that their machine was reading in ltr and not in naira (price) according to her and the 8000 she pressed was 8000ltr and not 8000 naira because she suddenly forgot and wasn't paying attention, and now she already sold 44ltr of fuel, who will pay is now the main problem because she was already begging with this sober eyes, and within me, I was calculate different ways of just running away 🤣, I had to tell her I don't have that kind of money because I already budgeted the amount I need and the economy wasn't smiling, she try all possible way to draw out the fuel in the car but it wasn't possible even the mechanic she called couldn't do anything, we were left with either alert the manager and she get fired or I find way to pay what she sold (borrowing more money and be in debt) and she get to keep her job.

Even though I was trying to channel the hard guy spirit and just scatter everything, it wasn't channeling and she loosing her job in this hard period might give me sleepless night, well to cut the story short, you know what soft heart made me do in the end. I just wish I have this hard guy spirit